Another Father’s Day in the books.
When your children are past the pubescent stage and friends, video games and the opposite sex have taken residence where parents once prevailed, moms and dads no longer take the recognition of Hallmark holidays lightly.
So when the kids start texting, as was the case from my children who were not in town this year for Father’s Day, to tell my husband “Happy Father’s Day Pops” or “I heard a song last night that reminded me of you, dad”, it’s pretty awesome. Those sentiments from the children he sacrificed much for over the years trump my store bought card thousands of times over. And they should.
Once upon a time not so long ago, dad’s sat in hospital corridors waiting to be informed of the birth of their children and probably spent much of their children’s lives feeling very much the same; kind of secondary to the real involvement. Mom had the 24/7 responsibility but dad was available to swoop in and take care of business if discipline was necessary. How sad that men of previous generations missed out on their kids because if you miss out on the mundane and fascinating growing up stuff, I can’t imagine how you recoup and have an invested father/child relationship when they’re all grown up.
W wasn’t a perfect dad any more than I was a perfect mom. That said, he did do some pretty amazing things for our children over the years beginning with holding my hand through both labor and deliveries. Okay, he actually did fall asleep for some of the most intense contractions I’ve ever known with Nick, but hey….it was a long labor so I’ll cut him some slack on that one.
He was a “get on the floor and wrestle” kind of dad. He was the kind of dad who would change diapers without hesitation, who could put our babies to sleep with ease by doing this little rock/walk thing I could never master. He was the kind of dad who had no problem going to parent/teacher conferences and the kind of dad that the neighborhood kids thought was the coolest because he’d organize sandlot football games. He was the kind of dad who let me splurge (big time) on Devon’s proms and homecomings because her smile brings him so much happiness. He was the kind of dad who encouraged and supported good decisions and the kind of dad who coached everything from softball to baseball to football to lacrosse.
My children, both young adults now, can hopefully reflect and see all of the times their happiness came before his own. They can now view their dad as a man and not a superhero, knowing his mistakes and forgiving any tendency to being fallible. They can and do understand his great strengths and even the areas of his weaknesses. They can appreciate his ability to have unending love and passion for their wellbeing and they can sleep well at night knowing that he’d cross the world on foot if they needed him.
As a mom, I’m so blessed that he fathered and, more importantly, “daddy’d” these two wonderful people with me. We are a blessed family….frailties and victories making up our lives. We were blessed by the presence of a loving dad in our home and there are many families who didn’t have that. So, thank you, my sweet husband for loving those babies like you did. Thank you for loving those 2 young adults like you do.
Happy Father’s Day. No, Happy Dad’s Day.