On the road to better dog behavior!

They're all hairy little monsters

Tomorrow, Mary from Bark Busters will come to our house at 5pm and spend the evening with us. Probably not the most exciting night of recent memory, but I’m actually looking forward to gaining something close to well behaved dogs. Mary has her work cut out for her so I hope she rests up tonight and eats her Wheaties in the morning.

She and I had a long phone consultation this afternoon and I’ve already learned one thing! Seems Wally, who was party to the unfortunate “butt nibble” of a certain realtor about a month ago is kind of…ugh, tough to admit. He’s kind of racial profiling. It turns out the lady next door ~ the one who unceremoniously dumped dog waste in my yard as I watched from the living room window ~ has been mean to Wally and the realtor, of the same ethnicity and build, struck a chord. Pretty sophisticated thinking for a beagle, though admittedly embarrassing. Unfortunate coincidence.

I also learned that W and I will be undergoing training more than our canines. We will be prompted on how to become pack leaders and think like a dog. (Frankly, I think W can do that pretty well but she didn’t ask my opinion). Mary is even going to teach us the timeless art of growling at our dog. Yes, it turns out that guttural growling is more effective than stern voices because pack leaders do that. This is going to be the highlight of 2010! I’m paying someone to teach me to growl at my dogs. Awesome.

Kahlua is tagging along for the in-home training because she is the instigator of random barking and general annoyances. I have such hope for her to blossom and become a social butterfly; the belle of the day care playyard. This is a pipe dream and Mary has already cushioned the blow by indicating that some dogs are just “independent”. Thank you for not insulting my dog, Mary. Truly, you may be the first. Just wait until you meet her.

All of this fun is mandatory as part of the fine attached to Wally’s butt nibbling episode but I can say that it’s long overdue. Though we love our dogs, they can be kind of a nuisance on walks, randomly barking at one passerby while ignoring the next. No rhyme or reason, they resemble a 2 year old overtired toddler who has had too much sugar and too little discipline. Yep, I’m THAT mother.

So I’ll keep you posted. Maybe I’ll even demonstrate my guttural growl once I’ve mastered the technique.

One Reply to “On the road to better dog behavior!”

  1. I’m glad to find out that my dog is not the only one that racially profiles! He doesn’t like hats either!

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