Worrier

I’m a worrier.

I come by this trait via both of my parents who are big worriers. I always recognized it in my mother~ she wore the burden of worry on her shoulders as evident as carrying around a boulder strapped to her back. My father, on the other hand, was far more subtle. It appeared that nothing bothered him but I later realized he would sit up into the wee hours of the night (chain smoking, which he no longer does) and “watching” documentaries of WWII or some black and white spaghetti western when, in fact, he was worrying about a mess and how to fix it before anyone noticed it.

My worry can be consuming. Worry, simply put, is focusing your thoughts on something that MIGHT happen. Usually, in fact, it WON’T happen. But we do it anyway. Moms worrying about their children; dads worrying about their job security; grandparents worrying about the state of the world; you get the idea….Have you ever stopped to consider the mental effort we’re wasting? Worse than that, worry can lead people into depression and isolation….all for something that hasn’t even taken place! I’ve actually begun arguments with my husband because I’m worried about something that might happen and he’s left to reasonably offer explanations on why it won’t happen. Ridiculous.

I read this quote this morning and it really resonated with me. I’m not going to worry about my mom who was admitted to the hospital last night, for instance. My prayers will do more for both my mother and for me than my lack of sleep over worrying. I have done battle with this habit before and have won a few bouts but I’ve definitely lost more than my share. Worry is a formidable opponent and, admittedly, it kicks my butt more than it should. Today, and only today, I will focus on eliminating this useless energy sucker from my day while I replace it with positive thoughts and prayer.

Tomorrow is tomorrow and I’ll meet it when it gets here. If I’m going to win this war, I have to focus on it day to day, hour to hour. I want my prayers to be lifted; not my unfounded and inflated concerns.

Be blessed,

Amy