It’s ok to be who you are!

So here’s my latest discovery! I am an introverted feeler.
Okay, before you throw your hands up and wonder why I’m going down the path to Crazy Town, hear me out. This discovery was huge! I have taken quite a few Myers Briggs tests that help determine my personality type (wait~ did I hear someone chuckle? My employer made me do it!) but it wasn’t until today that I actually zeroed in on a description that is truly accurate. In the past, my results have panned out to be a semblance of me with quite a few exceptions. Close but not exact. So….finding the description of an introverted feeler was like discovering ME.

(As taken from http://www.infjs.com/)

• Introverted feeling types value personal experience and subjective meanings so highly, they look down upon collective opinions and the extraverts who hold them.
• They become inflexible when their deepest beliefs are threatened.
• Their intuition is extraverted.
• These people are absolutely certain as to the soundness of their ideals, but this is accompanied by a helpless feeling that it will never be possible to realize them in this world.
• In spite of ever-repeated collisions with the world and with other people, they can never give up their wish to love them both.
  
• Even if they are not able to express it clearly in words, they are inwardly quite certain as to what accords with them and what does not.
  
• they are nearly always misunderstood, and they tend more or less to resign themselves to this situation.

See why this was such an important discovery?? This changes and explains everything. Apparently only 12-15% of the general population are introverted feelers and, in case you’re interested, we are very high achievers and some of the most loyal people you’ll ever have the pleasure of meeting….if we stand in accordance with you. 🙂

My husband is an extrovert. Big time. Even after nearly 3 decades with me, he doesn’t get why I’m drained by idle chit chat with people I don’t “connect” with. For him, connecting isn’t even an issue. He just likes to talk and be talked to. To anyone. I think it’s possible that he and I are pretty extreme in our personality types and that can be a problem if toes are stepped on and lack of understanding morphs into disrespect.

What a relief this discovery was for me… after reading quite a bit about my particular “type” of personality, I discovered things I knew but could never articulate clearly.

**I am not shy. If I’m quiet in a circumstance or situation, it is generally because I’m just not engaged or particularly interested…turns out we don’t “fake it” very well.

**Nor am I aloof. I’m just taking it all in.

**I’m not an attention seeker. In fact, attention is stressful unless I’m surrounded by people who I share a common, passionate interest. If that happens, no one else has a chance of getting center stage! (yep, sounds right)

Believe God created you a certain way? I do! I have been released to feel completely comfortable feeling the way I feel. No more apologies from me on this subject. No more trying to explain why a root canal is preferable to that cocktail party of strangers. Now I know why my closest relationships happen when there’s room to breathe; too much of a good thing leaves me breathless. I also know why failed relationships take such a heavy toll; I heavily invest…and hate to abandon. That’s the feeler part, I guess.

The point is this. KNOW who you are and that Christ created you this way on purpose. Embrace it. Set yourself up to be in situations where you thrive and breathe deeply when you’re in situations that feel awkward. Stretching ourselves is good…changing who we are isn’t.

Be blessed,
Amy